Nancy Goodhart, EngAGE C.O.O., shares a personal story.
Rooted in Art
Art and I met quite unexpectedly, under dire circumstances. Here’s how it all went down.
Life happened one day. After 33 years of marriage, we abruptly split up. It all went south so fast. Everything I thought I had was gone. My future plans and lifelong investments became null and void, overnight. I entered a new world, unprepared, dazed and confused.
Without the distraction of possessions to gather or assets to chase, my new reality, as a single woman in her late fifties, seemed uncomplicated, at a glance. But instantly I knew what I was challenged with: I needed to find my center, my purpose, my Self. I needed a new game plan, a new life plan, and a new perspective. I moved through, with a head full of windy thoughts, one day at a time.
Fortunately, I was employed with a very cool and creative nonprofit organization as a fitness instructor and Program Director for older adults. I had a secure job, and it was feel-good work. Days were full of energy, creativity, and positivity. Then, every workday would come to an end, and I would find myself in that hollow emotional space, that empty place. Unfilled spaces can go awry so easily.
It was an average day on the job when I was first introduced to Art. I was well aware that flirting with Art was way outside my comfort zone and my skill set, yet I felt gutsy and intrigued. It was good timing. Defaulting to my pragmatic, familiar self, I reviewed my situation to inform my next move. My money was tight, and there was no room in my budget for outings or costly pastimes. What I did have was a plentiful amount of free time and emotional space to invite in a new energy. Forget my lack of experience, I told myself, a healthy distraction is a good thing, So, if not now, when? It was calculated. I was going to do the Art thing and see where it went.
I took the initiative and made the first move with the tools that I knew I had, and with the mental images that I had been entertaining.
Pencil and Paper. Trees and Leaves.
I was drawing, one pencil stroke at a time. Trees felt safe – their shapes and designs were imperfect and unpredictable – Wabi Sabi-like. Each pencil mark, each crooked branch and tenacious root, grew energy and hope inside me. Forming leaves of life, in all their stages of sprouting, maturing, and falling, grounded me. Brushing away the dust from erased mistakes felt heart-healing.
I was feeling content, and curious about myself, if just for minutes at a time. And those minutes were golden. Art was way more than just a distraction or a time filler; we found meaningful connection in a simple and unassuming way. Art became my unpaved path to healing. We were traveling together, footloose and fancy free. And it wasn’t about where we were going, where the bumpy path would lead us; it was about our journey, our detours, our do-overs, and all the discoveries along the way.
Through the years, in a quiet and unannounced way, we grew deeply rooted and entwined, spending more and more time together. We were EngAGED and energized with all the creative possibilities our union presented.
As I write this, seven years later, Art and I have tied our creative knot. I am wholeheartedly committed to, and grateful for, this soul soothing, imperfect and forgiving, endlessly supportive presence in my life.
Nancy Goodhart
EngAGE C.O.O.
July 2021
